Virtual Insanity

The video game industry. In 2010, it is one of the largest markets on the planet. The amount of people who own a console, play games on their pc, or any handheld peripheral in this day and age is staggering. No longer are they 'just for kids', now there is a whole campaign about getting the whole family involved. I've played video games for the majority of my life and these are some of my thoughts that I have about them.

My video gaming career started from a young age. I used to be in love with the Sega Mega Drive, Sonic the Hedgehog 2 in particular. I didn't own one, I used to go round to my friend Theo's house and play it till my fingers hurt. There was one time when my Mum had come to pick me up, called for me about 5 times to no reply, so Theo's Mum came up to tell me it was time to go, and I told her to fuck off! At 7 years of age! Rah, looking back that is some next level of hooked, and it only got worse.

I had all the Gameboy shit, must have clocked all the pokemon games (never did catch them all though, what was the point?). There were some other sick games on Gameboy/Gameboy Colour, Zelda springs to mind. We got a big fucking Dell PC around the time I was in year 5, and me and my Dad used to boss it on this game called 'Commandos: Behind Enemy Lines'. It takes place in WW2 and you control all these little dudes that run around and kill Nazis, although there is an emphasis on stealth in the early levels you can just cruise around doming Germans to your heart's content, gets a bit trickier once you get into Germany and that though. So anyway, I used to sit at this big fucking Deller for hours on end, there were other games that I used to hit up too, flight simulator, lego rock raiders, all which kept me amused to no end.

I always used to ask for a playstation when my Birthday or Christmas was near, even though I knew my Mum would never get me one. The first console I ever got was a Nintendo 64, donated to me by a friend who got a PS2 (what a nice guy!). Now as soon as I got one of those, I knew I was on to something. There were some dooooooope games for that console, Ocarina of Time motherfucker!! Banjo Kazooie, Donkey Kong, I could go on (if any of you ever played Conker's Bad Fur Day, come talk to me, that game was toooooo crease). From N64 we moved up to a PS2 which my brother got for his birthday (what a wanker! Pops got it cheap at Makro, gotta love). So that was a pretty sick console for a while, although it kind of lived in my brother's room which was a bit gay, couldn't really hit games late night. I forgot to mention, I used to share a babysitter and the kid who I shared with had a PS1, we played every sick game on that, Tony Hawk's, Metal Gear Solid, Crash Bandicoot bla bla bla. When he got a PS2 he donated me his PS1, and I think there is when my love of RPGs (Role playing games, not rocket propelled grenades) began. I bought Final Fantasies 7, 8 and 9, and completed 7 and 9, didn't really like 8, the magic system was a bit fucked up.

This must be getting a bit boring for you guys, so I'll wrap up my gaming history as quick as I can (no promises). When I got a computer with the internet in my room, a whole new world opened up to me - online gaming. I started off getting fucking hooked on a game called Counter Strike: Source. It's your basic shooter, you run around as either a Terrorist or a Counter Terrorist trying to plant or defuse a bomb or saving/protecting hostages. There are massive public servers which anyone can join, but the real beauty of that game was when you found 4 other people and had a match. This involved using VOIP (voice over internet protocol) programs such as Ventrilo or Teamspeak (you thought skype was new! ha!) to talk with your teammates, telling them where the enemies are, basically becoming a fucking nerd, but I didn't care I was having way too much fun. I joined various clans (teams online) and had varying degrees of success. Obviously the more you play the better you get, but I was hampered somewhat by my shit pc and my wireless connection, sometimes my internet would just drop right in the middle of a league match, my clanmates were not amused. I didn't really have the money to buy a sick gaming pc, which is what you need really if you want to take it seriously. There were tri-annual LANs where everybody from the community would take their pc to like a big events hall or something, sleep there, and have a tournament. The prizes at these events ranged from pc peripherals (headsets, mice) to 15 grand. While I never went to one of these, I seriously considered it at some points. In some ways I'm glad I didn't, I would have never found my way back!

I said I was gonna wrap up my career quickly, well there's still one more games I haven't told you about. I haven't told many people this, because it's very embarassing (and here I am writing it up on the fucking internet), but yes, I used to play World of Warcraft. I know. Fucking WoW. I remember telling myself I was never ever going to play that game, that I was too cool and too into Counter-Strike (we used to hate on WoW all the time on Vent). But a couple of my Counter-Strike 'friends' downloaded the demo, so I gave it a chance, and bought it when my 7 day trial ran out. I'd like to take a moment here to talk about the people that you meet online. You get your run of the mill spastics who badmouth everything and everyone, and by god you learn to fucking hate them, but you also meet people who want to play the game and use teamwork to do well. I was one of those, although I did my fair bit of abusing, only when it was due of course (sometimes not hehe). One friend I met playing WoW (and Counter-Strike) I actually went down and visited in Cornwall, and I had a sick fucking time. He's a couple years older than me, at Bournemouth uni now designing computer games or some shit, but he wasn't a spotty nerd with a pasty grill and glasses, he was just like me, although slightly emo-er, but it wasn't an issue, we puffed nuff cron and had good times.

Deviated yet again, right World of Warcraft. Yea, so once you actually play the game, if you're not hooked by level 10 there's something going on. The scope of detail in that game, even if you are mildly interested in fantasy (orcs n shit), is fucking unreal. It is literally another life online. You don't have to eat and wash and shit (although you can eat), but once you get it in your head that you want your character as G'd out as possible, you will become addicted. It's not really a game you can play casually, although there are some players like that, but you get the most enjoyment out of it if you just immerse yourself in it (for 15 quid a month I think most people would want to get what they paid for). Of course, your social life suffers. Mine did. To be honest I would basically run home from school and sit on it till bedtime really, proper fucking hooked. I basically lost my first girlfriend because of that, I mean I still saw and fucked her obviously, but in the end it was just me being a fucking knob. Now the people I met on this game were another level of hooked. There would be people in my guild (clan, whatever) that would be on from the moment they woke up to the moment they went bed. There was this one mum who was on it all day with her kid, he didn't go school or nothing they just both sat side by side on their computers. In Counter-Strike you have to use strategy to win, and in World of Warcraft once you reach the top level (70 when I was playing, think it goes up to 90 or something now) you basically start blinging out your character, and you can only do that by killing gnarllllly bosses in the dirtiest dungeons. You can't even enter these dungeons unless your 25 man deep, so each night I used to sit in a vent with 24 other people, more sometimes, and try and take down these stupidly hard bosses. You would spend whole nights just constantly dying against one boss, and when you know it wasn't your fault and someone elses because they wouldn't move out of the fucking way of the chain fireball or something, you start to get a little bit wound up. And then there were other nights where you killed the fucking dirtiest boss you'll ever find and it would drop some siqqqq garms that boosted your stats above the fucking stars and you remember why you play this game.

So yea, my name's James and I used to play World of Warcraft, not proud about it but it was a fucking good game, anyone who tries to chat shit you can't even begin to understand. When I had finally kicked the habit, I sold my characters for 300 euros to some danish kid. Bet your not laughing now! Well you probably are, who am I kidding, I'm never gonna get that time or that girlfriend back. Anyway, I started writing this to discuss video games not just my neeky life, back to the matter at hand.

Think about the games that were around when you were growing up, they were nowhere near as advanced as they are now. Take Call of Duty for example. If we all that growing up we would be fucking hoooooked! (I prestiged once, instantly regretted it, never doing it again). Kids (and adults) are growing up today in an ocean of online entertainment, you can sit in front of a screen all day and be kept amused, I feel living proof of that. But what are all these games doing to the youth of today?

How many kids do you know that are under ten years of age yet have played games that are 18+ rating? Nuff. Now, this is against the law, they would never be able to buy it in the shop (I saw some little kid asking for GTA in game one time, fucking funny the way the guy was just like NO), so how do they get hold of them? Basically Mummy sees this game, kid whines on for a solid week about how he NEEDS it in his life, Mum finally caves and buys it for him. Now, in my eyes, when Mum goes to game and plonks down Left 4 Dead 2 on the counter, the guy behind the desk should ask who the fuck she is buying it for, because quite clearly she's not gonna race home and started blowing out zombie brains (that last sentence could be taken....sexually), it's for little Timmy at home who's gagging to see some heads roll. Parents who buy overage video games for their children are basically lazy, they see that their kid really wants this game and they know that it will free up alot of time in their day where they don't have to clean up piss and shit (ok maybe I went a bit too far) and they welcome it with open arms.

So the youth of today is fucked, let's talk about something positive. Obviously not all video games are bad, I for one think that the nintendo Wii is a really good idea. To be fair I don't own one, I just see the adverts but the idea of making console gaming something everyone can enjoy not just watching your mate (wilf) destroy your KD on CoD is a good idea. Also, if the people you met online weren't fucking idiots half the time you might actually have fun for once, people don't seem to understand that when you communicate it makes the game 20 times easier. As a possible career choice (making music for video games), I think its important that the video game market stays healthy, but at the same time I would like to see it keep moving forward at the pace that it is now. They say the next generation consoles are gonna blow our fucking minds, that it's going to be some VR shit but personally I don't think I would enjoy running around inside some polygon world all that much. I would like to see some new ideas, new controllers and shit (they never experiment, playstation has had the same trolly for time, I suppose if it ain't broke don't fix it), just a general breath of fresh air. Also, I would like to see them stop wasting money on releasing pointless games such as High School Musical 2 for the DS (don't know if that's an actual game, probably is though). The amount of resources and effort it must take to make a complete game must be alot, why waste it making a remake of Pocahuntas.

Whether you love them or hate them, video games are slowly becoming more and more intertwined with out lives. And despite what people say, they are a good source of release, but only if you play well! There is nothing worse than coming home after a stressful day and playing like some fucking diseased donkey on call of duty, it will make you want to put your fist through your screen. At the same time, they are slowly destroying working class Britain, so many people just collect their dole and sit on WoW, I mean it's not like they need much money to live, just an internet connection and a subscription. In my opinion this is why we have so many foreign workers doing the 'shit' jobs in this country, because most of the youth of today wouldn't take a job in a warehouse for shit pay, and the Polish are more than happy to work it, especially since it pays better than at home. Anyway, I've rambled on for long enough and it's nearly closing time at work, so I'll save you all and fuck off.

More gaming less flaming (only the 1337 will get that)

James